M is for MOXIE.

 //via.//

This is it! The night we've all (kinda) been waiting for!

• Snowy Iowa makes for a far more desolate-looking Iowa.
• Awww, Chris holding three baby girls! Swoon.
• Really appreciate that accurate possessive 's on the mom's byline. Way to go, ABC.
• Not at all digging the statement necklace with the plaid, Whit.
• Waiting on that go-to hop and cling!
• Ooooh, but that shuffle was way more awkward.
• You know her legs are freaking freezing.
• She is reeeeeally playing it up. Telling him how much she loves him and presenting mom with flowers all, "These were my mom's favorite flower."
• Love that Chris has an arm hooped around the child, beer in hand. Sign of life to come.
• Yeesh. Can you imagine being grilled by the three sisters? It's funny for as downright silly as this show can be, how REAL it gets. Or tries to get.
• "Whitney is clearly all in," - sister. Uhhh, YEAH.
• Girl is laying it on thick.
• It's a little heavy to tell her that you could call her mom... I mean...
• But also, I really think she's genuine. 
• He hasn't told either of them he loves them yet, right?
• Ahhh, here we go. Shop talk with the bros!
• This would be a little easier to enjoy if the horrendous soap opera background score wasn't playing over.
• She is so pretty!!! I know I say it every week, but I just love her.
• And a baked goods tray!! Can't go wrong, girl! You know your Midwesterners!
• Loving her chambray too. Becca gets all the points.
• She's charming them too... I think Whitney was crazy reassuring, but it's obvious that Chris and Becca are really into each other.
• Poor girl. What a legitimate concern though, "if Whitney is ready to pick up and move babies..."--and wow, props to her for blatant honesty and sticking to her guns.
• Obviously all the sisters want him locked down with someone, but just because it looks all shiny with Whitney today doesn't mean it will next month or year.
• I love mom's interviewing style! "Tell me whatcha think about THAT!"
• Awwww, mom pushing Becca's hair out of her eyes--so sweet.
• His mom is seriously the cutest thing. A great combination of loving and endearing, and fiercely protective.
• I'm digging Becca's black coat.
• And those booties!!!
• Yeaaaah, that was a decidedly tenser departure than Whitney's.
• I love the brother-in-law chiming in with the black and white, attorney-style approach. "This isn't about yadeyadeyadah..."
• Dad nailed it! Whitney is the sure thing, but Becca is who he wants.
• Uh oh. "Shocking twist." Hmmmkay, Harrison.
•  In case anyone is wondering, the Hotel Julien in Dubuque will set you back about $130 a night. Go wild.
• Lolololol, that little hotel doorway exchange was cute.
• HA! The hotel's website is already boasting an "As Seen on ABC's The Bachelor!" banner.
• Is he drunk? Or just nervous? Both?
• I admire her to no end for stating she can't commit to a timeline on when she could move. I think that's so respectable.
• Oh gosh. This is getting deep.
• Poor guy... he's pushing her so hard, but she's just stuck in repeating her feelings, dripping in apprehension.
• I hate myself a little for saying this, but it's kinda breaking my heart that he clearly wants her so badly and she can't give him what he wants to hear.
• I'm actually crying. "I don't know what's going to happen, but I would have your back and we could figure it out." Like, really? Could it be any better if it was scripted? The answer is no.
• What the hell is he walking out with in his hand? 
• He waves like a farmer.
• She just said, "it's nipply out here." Hmm.
• Easy, girl. No one is excited about picking corn in snow. Not even the dude who owns the farm.
• Her jacket with that asymmetrical zipper? Upwards of $500. Not exactly fitting for farm life.
• Again. She's really working hard to sell it. Like, we get it. You're genuine... but reel it in.
• Nice truck, Soules!
• "This is Dad's farm... these two. That farm? Mike and I own together. This is the farm I bought with dad. Ohhh, I own like 800 acres." So basically, all of Iowa belongs to ME.
• I get it... she's into him. But it really doesn't seem like they've genuinely connected. Everything seems so surface level. That she's a sweet girl who wants a husband and a family and is willing to move to Iowa to get it... but in terms of chemistry, I don't know that I would have even placed her top 5 in terms of chemistry with him. But that's just me.
• He just seems less comfortable, overall, with her. Not that he's uncomfortable, per se, just not like a husband and wife situation. She's just safe. All kinds of safe.
• Uh, yeah, you've carried the picture every single place you've been because at any given moment, you could be sent home and should thus, have all of your possessions on your person.
• So, Chris, you're waiting for your "aha" moment with Whitney, but can't really wait for Becca to have that with you, hmmm? Conundrum.
• Why did she have to take him into the bedroom to talk about last regrets? 
• He asks why she's so sure about him... she claims that she can read his mind and there are things that can't be explained. Well done, girl.
• If she's as scared as she keeps saying she is, she's doing a good job of masking it with that southern charm.
• Ha! He added a little caveat of "...no matter what happens" on the end of that compliment. Youch.
• Now what is he walking out with?! What is this swiping things from the hotel routine?
• Here we go ABC, all of the morning of, getting ready shots.  Footage every Bachelor(ette) loser would loooove to destroy.
• So let's talk more about how pretty Becca is.
• Oh, hullo Neil Lane!
• You think that oval diamond is a recycling of Andi's?
• Wow. Pretty merlot colored dress, Becs.
• Matches his tie.
• Here. Lemme get down on one knee in this freezing ass farmhouse, girl.
• The sentiment is cute... and well, I guess ABC went all out with the Horchow chandeliers.
• That lone rose is giving me anxiety. I really don't want either of these girls to be hurt, but obviously that's the name of the game.
• Really, Chris? You didn't realize it would be this hard?
• Visible breath. In formal wear. In a barn. Just taking notes here.
• Oh, sweet Becca. Poor girl. She's holding it together pretty well.
• She kinda looks relieved.
• You can totally hear his heartbeat through the mic.
• Hop back in the limo, Becs... time for your twelve-hour drive back to civilization.
• How awkward to have to wait until you can dry it up over heartbreak #1 before you propose to your wife? Not exactly a fairytale, but part of it, I suppose.
• I really wonder how much time has transpired between the two interactions.
• Stop shaking, girl. And cool it with the occasional Southern twang.
• Okay, all ABC-edited pauses considered, this is sweet.
• They seem happy. Job well done.
• Where's this "shocking twist?"
• It's so funny how the first reciprocated "I love you" is like a light switch... the damn emotion of it all is what sucks us all back every season, right?
• Truly, I think she was the best for the role. I'm glad it worked out for them, and I daresay I think it'll last.

Now, After the Final Rose!! Let's get to it.

• Stupid twangy music, ABC.
• I like him scruffier.
• He's really sweet and affirming of her.
• Soules and Harrison seem like genuine buds.
• I can't wait for Becca to stroll out and look all hot.
• BAM, there she is!
• She looks so freaking gorgeous. Get it, girl.
• She is so eloquent and calm. I just love her. (as if you couldn't tell)
• Stop hyping up this "unprecedented announcement," Harrison. You're totally building it up to be an assured letdown.
• Whoa... short dress, girl. No need to see the bits and pieces. You've locked this up.
• Not really a big fan of the ring. Sorry.
• Not a big fan of the dress either. Kinda reminiscent of Kathy Bates's cellophane number in Fried Green Tomatoes.

• I'm ready to hear who the Bachelorette is. #KAITLIN
• Whitney should be a press secretary. She's very well spoken--even more well spoken after she got the guy. Good for her.
• Awww, cute that his parents are right there.
• Whoa... the baby pressure already.
• Okay, I like them a lot. Please don't break up.
• Alright, let's wrap this up.
• Ha. Jimmy Kimmel is quite the perk to this yawnfest.
• Omg, stop it with the cow. That's hysterical.
• They really are glowing... I love it.
• My guess is they haven't chosen a Bachelorette, but there will be some kind of dance off for the role.
• Damn, I am good!!!! Sorta.
• WHOA... two Bachelorettes?!!! I am loving this!
• Okay, I am crazy excited about this... in the end, these were two of my favorite three.
• Britt really tamed it down with the eye makeup! She looks amazing. They both do.
• I love Kaitlin!! "Well, that's not ideal." LOLOLOL.
• I am seriously pumped about this... great move, ABC.
• Monday, May 18th! Penciled in! 

Thanks for following along, y'all! Cheers to Chris and Whitney ;)